awaiting the vacation

these last days before vacation are just neverending, I usually put on myself more workload, so that I get the feeling I do deserve the rest. and maybe also to forget about other problems of my life... well fukit. i have 5 days to go and it still feels like eternity, three more ambassads, four more hotels and one more pub. and one still asks what the heck. why do I do all of this, wouldnt it be much easier to just buy a piece of land somewhere (or move somewhere up north, where land is basically for free and just live in a natural way, forget about all the internets, mp3s, OCRs and all the bull5hit? I dont know, really, i know that I am a slave of the information technologies, but on the other hand, when I am for too long on the vacation in Slovak country in my home village, I just start longing after all that fuzz of technology and buzz of the city...

Well, some propaganda... 

But this is just completely sick... I mean isnt it? 

What the heck?  

Cannot find server

I was just thinking about the relations, as I was baking this carrot cake, this time actually with baking powder, so it tastes good, well I was thinking that I am developing much worse attitude towards relationships each time one of my relationships breaks.

I was thinking that maybe if I stayed with the first girl I fell in love with I would be faithful to her. Well, looking back at my relatioships, I think that each time my love is refused I get this impresion that it is not worth engaging in a lasting relationship.

But than on the other hand, I cannot only blame women, I mean, it is a question of egg and chicken, because due to the burn in relationship I dont take each relationship equally serious and than I cause the burn for somebody else. And here we come to my long advertise wish, I wish I had been female. I mean I am completelly comfortable being male, but I just admire females. I think I have this impression that females wouldnt do that kind of bad things as we males are able.